I worry and stress a lot. Nearly all the time, and always, always before going to sleep. I’ve read recently about a technique that is meant to help with that. It’s a very simple thing really, you just assign specific time for worrying, say 15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes in the evening. During this time let your anxiety run wild, list your worries, try to come up with solutions, stress to your weird little heart’s content. But once the time is up, you put the worries in the box and not touch them until the next worrying session. If the worry starts bothering you during the day or night, just remind yourself that it is locked in the box. Again it’s a simple concept, and perhaps just a little bit silly and smelling strongly of pop psychology, but I’ve decided to give it a go.
My first 15 minutes of worrying starts now.
- I’ll never find work again, ever, nobody will ever even give me an interview. The only job I have any hope of obtaining is one that no one else wants – like cleaning vomit from the cubicles of a dingy pub’s toilets.
- I’ve no money.
- I will never have money and will end up homeless.
- I’ll end up old and alone, forgotten by the world, in some institution and nobody will notice when I die, for like a week, until I start to smell and rats are chewing on my decomposing remains.
- All my friends secretly hate me. I’m not sure why they continue to hang out with me, I never said I was rational.
- I’m not rational.
- I’m not a proper adult, I don’t understand adult things.
- I’m too much of an adult and I’m becoming boring.
- I am boring.
- My English is not as good as I want it to be and my Polish is starting to disintegrate.
- When we get a dog it will never love me, it’ll sense my inner wrongness and will judge me for it.
- I have an inner wrongness about me.
- My teddy bears don’t like me.
- I own teddy bears and sometimes I’m not ashamed of it (see “I’m not a proper adult”).
- Sometimes I’m ashamed of having teddy bears (see “I’m too much of an adult”).
- I don’t read enough these days.
- Some days I read too much.
15 minutes is up. Into the box you stupid things! Aaaaand breathe….